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A speedrunner’s quest to (re)build the perfect N64 controller

There’s a slow-boiling controller crisis in the Nintendo 64 speedrunning community, and it has created a unique form of hell for one Mario Kart 64 champ.

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A good video game speedrun is a marvel to witness. You watch players fly through your favorite games, hitting impossible jumps and finding shortcuts you never knew existed. It makes you see a familiar game in a whole new light. If you’ve never watched a speedrun, check out this world-record run through the original Super Mario Bros., and you’ll see what I’m talking about. Being, you know, a speedrun, it’ll take all of five minutes of your time.

But what you won’t see (unless you follow speedrunners on Twitch) is the hours upon hours of work it took to create that perfect run — the thousands of attempts to navigate a game with perfect precision, shaving off every unnecessary move, exploiting every weird glitch. It’s punishing work for the player — and for the controller they use run after run, day after day. And all that “grinding,” as speedrunners call it, is taking an unexpected toll.

On this episode of The Vergecast, we explore a looming crisis in the Nintendo 64 speedrunning community: players are grinding their controllers to plastic dust and at such a quick pace that optimal N64 controllers are growing scarce. We also speak with Beck Abney (abney317 on Twitch), a Mario Kart 64 speedrunning legend who is dealing with an even more bizarre, personal form of controller hell.

This also happens to be the first episode in our “Five Senses of Gaming” miniseries, so stay tuned every Sunday this month for another gaming story about another sense. And yes, if you read that sentence and thought Really? Smell? Taste!?, well... buckle up.

If you want an even deeper dive into the wild world of speedrunning, here are some links to get you started:

A great primer on the Nintendo 64 joystick shortageWatch abney317 on TwitchMariokart64.com, the home of the MK64 speedrunning community“The quest to beat abney317” on YouTubeMore on Beck Abney’s controller problems
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Maradona's stolen '86 Golden Ball to go on auction

Diego Maradona's Golden Ball trophy won for being named the best player at the 1986 World Cup will be auctioned in France in June, the Aguttes auction house said on Tuesday.

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Diego Maradona's Golden Ball trophy won for being named the best player at the 1986 World Cup will be auctioned in France on June 6, the Aguttes auction house said on Tuesday.

This is the first Golden Ball to go for auction and while the value is still to be confirmed, the auction house expects it to fetch millions.

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Maradona, who died in 2020, won the award after leading Argentina to World Cup victory in Mexico, scoring five goals at the finals where he captained his country and played every minute of the tournament.

That tournament is probably best remembered for Maradona's two goals against England in the quarterfinals.

Maradona outjumped England goalkeeper Peter Shilton by using his hand to score the first goal with a raised fist, which he later dubbed as being scored by the "Hand of God."

The second was an incredible mazy slalom run from his own half, when he dribbled past five English outfield players, and was voted as the "Goal of the Century."

The jersey he wore that day, along with the ball from the match, have both previously been sold at auction.

After his display against England, Maradona went on to score the two goals which defeated Belgium in the semifinal and Argentina won a thrilling final 3-2 against West Germany.

The Golden Ball award was introduced at the 1982 World Cup, and its list of winners include Italy's Paolo Rossi, Romario and Ronaldo of Brazil, and Zinedine Zidane of France. Argentina great Lionel Messi is the only player to have won the accolade twice.

French newspaper L'Equipe reported on Monday that Maradona's award had been stolen but has resurfaced among several trophy lots in an auction room.

Recently it was entrusted to Aguttes, which carried out an investigation into its provenance and managed to authenticate it as Maradona's Adidas Golden Ball trophy.
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Dodgers ace Buehler expected to return on Mon.

Dodgers pitcher Walker Buehler is expected to make his return to the big leagues on Monday after missing nearly two full years following Tommy John surgery in 2022.

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Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Walker Buehler is expected to make his return to the big leagues Monday after missing nearly two full years following Tommy John surgery in 2022.

"The plan is Walker's going to start on Monday," Dodgers manager Dave Roberts said after Wednesday's 8-0 win over the Arizona Diamondbacks. "We're excited about that. Everything checked out. It'll be good."

The Dodgers play at home Monday against the Miami Marlins.

Buehler, a two-time All-Star, hasn't thrown in a big league game since June 10, 2022, against the San Francisco Giants. He's trying to become one of the few pitchers to bounce back from a second Tommy John surgery, which usually keeps pitchers off the mound for 12-18 months.

Buehler could make a talented Dodgers team even more formidable. He was one of the best pitchers in baseball during the 2021 season, finishing with a 16-4 record and a 2.47 ERA over 207⅔ innings.

Buehler had an extended rehab assignment in Triple-A over the past month as he prepared for his return, going 0-2 with a 4.15 ERA and 21 strikeouts over 21⅔ innings.

The Associated Press contributed to this report.
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